Like the great wild wildebeest of the Serengeti, the blog is moving to new territory. 

While it's still under construction and the User Experience is still as clunky as riding in the back of a wagon train, it's up and running. The content is all there. And it's sleek and minimal and beautiful as hell.

Some of you may be thinking, "dude, Hattie, this will confuse everyone!" maybe you're right. Plus, some of you made the journey from the old site only last year. But I've also been grappling with the discomfort I feel in combining my personal "author" website with my advice blog. It's felt a little too intertwined. The purpose of each website is pulling farther apart. I'm hoping to seek clarity in the goal and mission of each site by separating them, like when you don't want two different foods to touch on your plate to ensure neither compromises the flavor of the other (did I lose you?)

Either way, spend some time exploring the new site and shoot me a message if you notice any UX areas that are horrific or miserable to deal with. And, as always, thank you for being along with me on this journey. You have no idea how fortunate I feel for my readers. 

xo,
Hattie

While talking about the 5 Love Languages with my partner, he mentioned how he thinks "words of affirmation" is one of his love languages. He described how he was raised and how growing up his family always made a point to tell each other they loved one another. And I've noticed how true it is. They say it a lot and text it a lot, which has translated into our own relationship. We always say it before leaving for work. Before falling asleep. In text messages throughout the day. While sitting on the couch together. I love you, I love you, I love you like a revolving door out of which we hope to never step out. 

I feel both fortunate and scared by this. The knowledge that I am loved and that I love-in-return is difficult to process sometimes, especially when looking out into the world and knowing how reality can scratch something so seemingly shiny and beautiful. And, also, knowing how ugly the human heart can be. 

There came a time when I was about to say "I love you with all my heart" and I paused. For a split second it felt dishonest. It felt cheesy. It felt hollow since I'd heard so many people speak this phrase before me. I didn't end up saying it. 

Anxiety is really good at making us second guess ourselves, at pointing out the negatives, the what-ifs, the yeah-buts. Anxiety often causes me to second guess genuine emotion or authentic sentiment. And when I find myself wanting to make blanket black-and-white statements like "I will always love Jonathan Taylor Thomas!!" I cringe. Because life is a lot messier than that. And our emotions are painted in tones of greys. Life is more complex than a string of absolutes.

I know I'm not a perfect person. I can have dark thoughts, mean-spirited thoughts, and can act selfishly. While I strive in my daily life to choose kindness and positive-strength, that doesn't mean I don't still have ugly moments. Which means I don't want to say hyperbolic statements. My anxiety often makes certain that along with warmth I experience cold. Along with joy I find myself in despair. 

I love my partner. My heart is like a building where he has free rein, wandering from room to room learning the colors of every wall and the view from every window. He is there, everywhere, but I find it difficult to communicate this in words of affirmation. 

I am so honored to share this review of The Anxious Girl's Guide to Dating book, written by mental health blogger, Lauren Hayley.

Lauren has a beautiful blog about living with Borderline Personality Disorder, Cyclothymia, and Agoraphobia. She writes with warmth, self-awareness, and above all honesty. I came across her blog after we connected via twitter and fell in love with her artwork and insight into mental health. 

Her review made me tear up a bit, since it felt like connecting with the "reader" I had in mind while I worked on the project. Plus, she said this, which basically made me want to curl into a ball and weep silently:

A huge thank you to Lauren for taking the time to read this book and write such a lovely and well thought-out review.  

Check out her blog here!

Follow her on twitter here!





Grab your copy of the book:
Amazon
or
Barnes & Noble
or
Smashwords (pdf, online reader, epub, etc)

Just saw that The Anxious Girl's Guide to Dating is on Amazon's "Hot New Release" list for both Anxiety and Dating!!!!!! WHAT.

We're #2  (hehe) on the Anxiety & Phobia list and #13 for dating, which means the book is on the same list as Aziz Ansari's book (*faints*) 

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU

Get your copy on Amazon here and Kobo here.

Read the first few chapters fo' free right here on this website, yo.